Inside A Relationship

Setting: Studying a Boston transit map my first night visiting him.

Me: What if I end up in Rhode Island?
Him: *shakes head* You aren’t going to end up in Rhode Island.
Me: What would you do if I called you tomorrow and said I was in Rhode Island?
Him: I’d say “Get out of that small state! Get on a train; you’ll be back in the city in 40 minutes.”

Setting: post Mad Men on Sunday night, the Boyfriend calls. He usually goes to bed well before 11 p.m.

Me: How did you know I’d be staying up way too late watching an episode of Law & Order: SVU about corrupt judges?
Him: *laughs* Well I thought you’d call me before you went to bed.
Me: Do you want the Mad Men recap now or tomorrow? *the Boyfriend doesn’t have a TV/cable in Boston*
Him: Ah, why don’t you save it for tomorrow? It might be better then!
Me: Because you want to go to bed now. I know you too well.

Setting: Going out to dinner while I was in Boston

Him: Hey, Roommate, do you want to come? We’re going to dinner.
His Roommate: Really? I wouldn’t be intruding?
Him: Nah, Jillian and I get to talk to talk for 15, 20 minutes a night. We don’t really have to catch up with each other.

That last one was dripping with sarcasm.